A couple of posts ago, I attempted a response to “What Ifs”, but was waylaid by broken pottery. I’m trying again, and here is the quote from Jean-Pierre de Caussade, in Abandonment to Divine Providence:
“…those in whom God lives are often flung into a corner like a useless bit of broken pottery. There they lie, forsaken by everyone, but yet enjoying God’s very real and active love and knowing they have to do nothing but stay in his hands and be used as he wishes. Often they have no idea how they will be used, but he knows.”
So, taking up where we left off, let’s assume that our discernment was correct, that He did desire us to write the book, create the art, produce the workshops, enter the seminary/convent, or earn a degree in theology, but nothing comes of it. Everywhere we turn we encounter nothing but “visible” defeat, failure in the eyes of the world.
In our discernment, did we take the time to go beyond the “what” and ask Him “why”? Did we just assume that after the “what” was answered, the “why” was a given?
He wants you to write a book, so of course, it will be published to help others. Maybe not. Maybe in the process of writing the book, the Holy Spirit will reveal things to you which will heal childhood wounds and bring you straight into the arms of your loving Father/Mother. He wants you to paint icons, so of course, people will purchase them for their homes/parishes. Maybe not. Maybe through the act of painting you are being led into a deeper understanding of the mystery of the Holy Trinity or the Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary. He wants you to get a degree in theology, so of course, you will become a professor, eventually with tenure. Maybe not. Maybe He is trying to draw you to a particular spirituality, be it Carmelite, Ignatian, Franciscan, the practice of which will radically change your life.
Two things we often forget is that our first obligation is the salvation of our own soul, and that the Passion is not something to be entered into only during Lent and Holy Week. Does it ever occur to us that the “why” of these visible defeats may be for the benefit of our soul alone, in the beginning, for the purpose of our own progress in sanctity and towards union with Him?
How? Well, what are the general outcomes of these kinds of defeat? Loss of face, derision from those around us who had been sceptical from the first, humiliation, financial distress, discouragement, fear, pain, loneliness, rejection by the world and a sense of being abandoned by God Himself. Jesus would say it sounded only too familiar, wouldn’t He?
He wants us to identify these trials with His, and enter into them fully, for whatever length of season He chooses, so that when the Father looks at us, He sees the Son.
“Why should I have it any better than Jesus?” is something I once heard, and which comes back to me often. As does St. Teresa of Avila’s comment during the terrible ordeals of St. John of the Cross: “Jesus, You are so hard on Your friends; it’s no wonder You have so few of them.”
How can we become, or remain, one of those few? By recognizing and accepting the gift He is offering, the gift of union, through the Passion. Come, He says, and see what it is like to have been Me.
